Sunday, November 21, 2010

Just another day in the life of an under-achiever...by choice.

11:30 am. I stepped outside into the cool autumn breeze, the crisp air clinging to my exposed skin like a newborn to it's mother. The temperature has been steadily decreasing, which is a clear indication that winter is upon us. I've always been fond of this time of year. Not because of the holidays or anything; in fact, as I've grown older I've sort of just detached myself from Christmas. I've just grown to realize how consumer driven the holiday has actually become. It's all about who gets who the flashiest gift, or who didn't get what. I love this time of year because I love being able to step outside and smell winter. It may sound odd, but I definitely believe that winter has a smell. It's the smell of burning firewood. Ever since I could remember, this smell has brought me some sort of comfort, on a subconscious level. I stepped outside today on my way to work, in the midst of a developing snow storm, and just breathed in a huge nose-load of air. It smelled like snow and burning firewood. I knew I was going to have a great day.

12:00 pm. I arrive to work in quite possibly the best mood of all time. This was due to the "winter smell", but the large amount of niacin flowing into my bloodstream had a large role to play in it as well. Thank God for Rockstar, right?

4:30 pm. My burst of Rockstar induced energy begins to dissipate and for the first time in four hours, I feel it. I'm starting to crash. Hard. My legs begin to ache, I find myself growing more and more irritable by the second, and I feel increasingly sluggish with every step I take. Normally this would be the time that I'd be going home to a cozy air mattress. Not tonight though! As if by some cruel twist of fate, Fabian is working a double shift. Without a break. Fabian is not happy.

4:32 pm. Alex brings me a Full Throttle energy drink. Looks like I'm back in the game!

4:35 pm. It kicks in. I feel the ache in my legs melt away and my mood begin to lift. I'm running at what feels like 18 times the speed of light. That's right, fuck you Einstein.

9:00 pm. I'm five tables deep, my section metaphorically in flames, and I'm fresh as a fucking daisy. NIACINNNNNN! Now the only things that are throwing coal into my good mood train are the large amount of cash in my pocket, the fact that it was snowing outside, and from time to time the thought of her. Yes, avid blog readers. HER. She's truly amazing, that girl.

9:20 pm. Spoke too soon. Five tables deep. Section now literally in flames, and I'm about as fresh as a Jawa's underpants. Niacin, why have you failed me?

10:30 pm. Fabian is officially no sat. Fanfare proceeds to chime in. My legs feel like Flan. Flan sounds good to me, because I just worked 10 1/2 hours straight, without a break. I roll my silverware, do my checkout, and get my ass home.

3:30 am. Why I'm still awake is beyond me. I literally can't move my legs, my eyelids feel like they're holding 45 lb dumbbells, and I really just want to go to sleep more than anything in the world. The thought of leaving my blog post incomplete is kind of irking me. That's for sure keeping me awake. Also, as corny as it sounds, I'm thinking about her again. I don't know why I'm surprised. It happens every single time I see her after going an extended amount of time without seeing her. The expression "out of sight, out of mind" pops into my head, and to a certain extent I'd have to agree. Not seeing her very often definitely puts her on a back burner, so to speak. Not that I feel less strongly about her when she's away or anything, don't get the wrong idea. Not a day goes by that I don't wonder how she's doing, or if she's having a good / bad day, etc. Just seeing her again brings all those feelings back to center stage. She came to visit the other day and I have to admit that it was the best day I've had in a very long time. She was so gorgeous. I swear this girl is the epitome of perfection. Seriously. Look up the word in a Webster's Dictionary and I'm pretty sure that a picture of her will be right next to it. Do you see my dilemma now?! It's hard to sleep when just thinking about her makes my heart beat a million times a second. Her eyes, her smile, the way her hair smells. It's insane. I love this girl with every fiber of my being, yet life and it's cruel circumstances denies us being together. I know with the passing of time things will return to how they were. I'll still think about her from time to time, and we'll occasionally talk. I miss her. The day she left, I worked a double as well. I rushed home in between my shifts to see her before she left. Her hair looked adorable under her beanie. We embraced, kissed, and she left. I went into my room and laid down. I could still smell her on my sheets. That's all that's left of her from her visit. She's just a scent on my sheets. I miss her.

3:48 am. Very exhausting day. The air mattress I sleep on is calling my name in an almost hypnotizing manner, like a siren's song. It's time to hit the sheets. I anticipate a 10-14 hour mini-coma is in store for me, I earned it! Worked my ass off, made almost 300 dollars, cleaned my room, and still managed to update my blog? BAM! Not bad right? I guess it's just another day in the life of yours truly. :)

-Fabian

-Fabian

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